There was the time, not long ago, when my words came back to me decades after I uttered them. My son was trying to stop an argument between his children, and to my amazement, my own words — spoken to him so often during his childhood — spilled from his mouth: “I don’t care who started this argument, but I am going to stop it!”
It was a sweet moment of parental validation, albeit I had to wait for it till my son was in his thirties.
Just last week, my daughter called and with tears mixed with laughter, she told me that she wanted to thank me for every thing I had done for her when she was growing up. I was grateful for the thanks, but her tears gave me a clue that was not the real reason she was calling.
She finally told me that as she was getting her two ready for school and daycare while she was getting ready for work, her 5-year-old wasn’t cooperating. Finally, she looked him in the eyes and said, “Everyone else is being nice. Why can’t you give it a try, too?” My words of admonishment were now her words. Yahoo!
I remember the time I was visiting with a group of ladies. We were talking about criticism (not critically, of course) and one said, “I read something about that this week in the paper.” Then she proceeded to quote from a recent column — written by me! I felt like Harry’s writer friend in the movie, “When Harry Met Sally,” when he said, “I wrote that. No one has ever quoted me back to me before.” It made me feel like a real writer.
Those times, when my words came flying back to me, I felt pretty good about what I had said. It might not have been perfect parenting, but it was good enough that my own children were now using it on their children. My column might not have been Pulitzer Prize material, but it was good enough that people remembered what I had said.
But, every so often, my words come back to haunt me. Maybe I’ve been less than flattering when speaking of my husband, and someone will tell him what I said. Or maybe I’ve criticized what someone has said or done and it will get back to them. Or maybe I promised to do something and when I failed to do it, I will hear, “But you promised.” Or maybe I’m involved in a conversation I have no business being part of.
That’s when I remember the words of 2 Timothy 2:16: “Avoid godless chatter, because those who indulge it will become more and more ungodly.”
I wonder, if our words were quoted back to us, would we be proud? Embarrassed? Condemned?
“May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.” (Psalm 19:14).
Verna Davis, author and speaker, writes in Frankton, Ind. She can be reached at Vrdspeaks@yahoo.com
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Verna Davis: What to do when our words come back to us
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